Tuesday, August 3, 2010

ROAD TRIP!

With my previous post, I mentioned wanting to change the world. But what changes are you speaking of, Galactic Emperor Dave? After spending a bit of time on Route 70, the first change will be turning Kansas into a penal colony. It will definitely be a harsher punishment---I mean, they have running water in prison! In Kansas, they just have Jesus billboards and an aggregate IQ exceeded by certain families of dung beetles. But what exciting adventures await! Today's drive-thru states:

1. Missouri! A place where the only reason you have to wake up each morning is the urgent need to charge your pacemaker. For the littlest Golden Corral fans, now in child's sizes!

2. Illinois! By listening to the radio, I assume that Toby Keith is a minor deity. ("Boy, did you say MINOR??") Also, Barack Obama is from here, so I assume that somewhere within the population are 3 wise men, and a shit-ton of myrrh

Anyway, it's important to point out that I love this country. I really admire the founding fathers! I mean, they admitted Kentucky as a state, which clearly shows they have a great sense of humor.

Some pictures from the road:
At the end of that rainbow is a pot of Skittles. Which is a good way for people in Kansas to control their blood sugar.

Hitting you over the head with an environmental message picture time:
It's actually not windy, but someone at the Golden Corral did just fart.
In all seriousness, I miss Colorado. The last night was an absolutely awesome time at Lucho's, and it really embodied everything I love about this summer--great people, huge laughs, and amazing food. Also, alcohol and children. But not combined. That would be how Kansas schools conduct nap time.

Weekly mileage:
92 miles (2 total rest days for the knee)
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3 comments:

  1. 92 on five days. Wow.

    Still chuckling on the shit load of myrrh statement.

    A bit pissed at myself that I never connected with you whilst out here.

    All the best at Duke. But screw the men's basketball program. I mean Mike K is cool and all but if you could dump a back hoe full of myrrh on Cameron indoor stadium before each game, you'd get me to vote for you for president for the rest of my life regardless if you were on the ballot or not.

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  2. This is why Duke sucks: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYOgC2Qbqh4

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  3. GZ! Thanks so much for the comment. I grew up in MD (where my parents went) so I'm born with a deep-spirited hate of all things Blue Devil (hence my brother's comment above). Which either makes me the ultimate traitor, or the ultimate secret agent.

    I wish we had connected! I was holding out hope you'd be at Lucho's party in order to put a face to the name. And also to supply you with a year's worth of roofies. MALE BONDING :)

    Thanks again, and I will be following your blog throughout the year!

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