The Greatest Stories Ever Told (Law School Edition)

Imagine yourself sitting there in something called "Civil Procedure." It is a typical class, where we discuss such exciting topics as where exactly you should sue the girl with the Craigslist W4M add who, you later learn, appears to have a rare form of dyslexia where the first letter of any acronym is turned upside down. So we are sitting there, with our proverbial thumbs in their proverbial places of residence, when suddenly the professor (who is awesome), asks us a question about what he just drew on the white-board. Now this, dear readers, is the part of the blog where you can play along at home.

In the words of the professor, what is this???:

If you said that the professor should buy you a drink first, then you're something like me when I have the time to think of clever witticisms. If you had a nearly uncontrollable giggle-fit, then you're something like me in real life. And if you said that showing this drawing to an intern could get him on the Supreme Court, then you're probably Justice Clarence Thomas.

Anyway, for those scoring at home, the correct answer is "Scotland". And no, the professor never figured out why everyone was laughing. NINJA CHALKBOARD DONG STRIKES AGAIN.

They are everywhere, and nowhere. Also, that guy on the right wants you to know .....that isn't a belt.

In further law school-related unintentional comedy, last night everyone on the ACLU email list received a message. For those that don't know, the ACLU is all about tolerance and equal protection of the laws, which is admirable and possibly the most noble pursuit one can have as a lawyer. Hence, the email excerpted below, is full of ironic win:

Earlier this evening, as I left the Bikram yoga studio, I approached a woman I had met last week to say hello. "Ebony, right?" She looked at me blankly. "Ebony? We met last week. I'm Zack." This woman was not Ebony -- her named is Jeanine.

Oh gosh, I really, really (ed note: REALLY) like where this is going. "Ebony, right?" will forever after be my ice-breaker in social situations. He continues:

Now, to my credit, Jeanine and Ebony look a lot alike. Same build and facial structure, same skin tone, same braided hair.

I am guessing this is not Ebony.

At this point I am reading the email while stifling a horrified chuckle. He couldn't be doing what I think he's doing, right?? He could not possibly be using his own experience of getting a name wrong to infer that all black people look alike to white people in criminal investigations....

Cross-racial misidentification is extremely common. But it's "mistakes" like these that lead to wrongful arrests and convictions each and every day...I hope you take something away from this -- I know I did.

Holy. Crap. It's like Aesop had a lovechild with Michael Scott from The Office. This, my friends, is why you do not type fables from the Ivory Tower. Because even if you have an okay point, it may be obscured by your own horribly skewed perspective. Also, when you are typing from the Ivory Tower, all of the Ebony Towers look alike.

Training:
Wednesday--AM-6 miles easy
PM-10 miles (6 hard tempo)
Thursday-5 miles easy with 2 barefoot